7/30/11

Flowers remind me of love...its beautiful but eventually it dies...and all the petals fall off and it is completely not fixable. 

Dear World, 

i take things to personally. not in sports or anything. just life in general. why can't i just brush everything off and not even care. i hurt. i hate when my mom yells at me. i hate the fact my dad won't leave me alone. i hate nick. i hate him. he doesn't care about me so why should i care? i shouldn't..im giving up on everything. because it's all stupid and i can't take it. the feeling i get when he doesn't text back or when he does text back and acts like he doesn't give a pooop about me. that feeling hurts...no lie. but im over it. ha. as if that last statement was even true...i wish it was that easy. ill be okay...someday...

So we all have fears right? whether it comes to heights, bugs, or even fearing fear itself...everyone has atleast one fear.

i don't just have one...i have many. 

My fears:

1. Cockroaches (my biggest fear)

2. Something being under my bed that's going to get me when i sleep. i watched that movie on disney channel as a kid, its called "Don't look under the bed." one of the scariest movies ever when i was a kid.

3. ovens. i hate ovens. i can put stuff in an oven....i just can't take it out...i always burn myself....and thats why i am afraid of ovens

4. Getting pulled over by the cops....hasn't happened to me yet. thank god.

5. Im afraid of being alone in the dark. not like if someone else is in my house....just when it's me and its dark outside....and i always hear some creepy noise...it scares me so i have my bb gun.

6. talking to people....i dont really know what to say...like i just babble on about nothing all the time...because i don't know what to say to anyone.

7. Being unwanted. nuff said. 

8. im afraid that when i look over a cliff edge i will fall...im not scared of heights.....i love rollercoasters. just afraid of falling...i think everybody has that question in the back of their mind "what if i fall?"

9. failing. i hate failing people, in sports, school, anything.....i hate it and it scares me

10. last but not least im afraid that im gonna get up and leave the bathroom but im gonna have toilet paper stuck to my shoes or coming out my pants...like in the movies! 

anyways i just had to blog right now because i was kind of upset. about alot of poop. but the good news is....i made varsity volleyball. word.

-Sierra